My awesome brother and sister-in-law got us 4 movie tickets for Hannukah. How to use them? Here are our family friendly options, along with my “worth the price of popcorn”, “netflix instant queue”, or “watch it at your friend’s house, kids” ratings.
Tooth Fairy: proof that Dwayne Johnson will never give up a chance to cross-dress. Also, not sure if the PG rating is because it may crush small children’s belief in the existence of fairies or because you can see The Rock’s rocks in those tights.
Verdict: Watch it at your friend’s house, kids! Anyway, it just depresses me to see Julie Andrews acting when I know that she can no longer sing. The hills are alive, with the sound of irony!
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel: Got an “Is this a sign of the Apocalyse?” positive review in the New Yorker. Stars Zachary Levi, of Chuck (whom Dina thinks is “cuuuuuuuute”). David Cross, aka Tobias Funke, is back from the first one.
Verdict: Netflix Instant Queue. I am presuming that yosefblog would rather poke his eyes out and wander the wilderness of Thebes than see this movie. Moving on…
The Spy Next Door: Jackie Chan as a spy who gets a babysitting gig with his next door neighbor’s kids? Although I am guessing that his aging body might preclude his performing stunts to the level of awesomeness of, let’s say, Super Cop, I imagine it will still be awesome. Also, Dina thinks he is “cuuuuuuuute”. Bassie finds the concept of the use of spy paraphernalia for babysitting purposes rather humorous. And, as Dina said when she first saw the trailer: “Mom! Jackie Chan is the spy next door! And it’s not like Firelight! It’s real!”
Verdict: Worth the Price of Popcorn. No Fear. No Stunt Double. No Equal. No Contest.
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It really creeps me out when former acquaintances/current facebook friends announce that they are going to see double features of these movies, but they have no children. Kind of like those ladies who wear Disney character t-shirts on their days off or in any capacity, really.
Another thing that’s really annoying is when they’re teachers (elementary, but STILL). It just gives the profession a bad name.
I will not be seeing the spy next door when the new Michael Cera movie is playing concurrently. Yowsa!
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