accidental feminist

Having seen none of the films nominated for best picture, I think I am the most objective person to speak on the subject. Pitt and jolie should get best actor/actress, thereby bringing the rapture. Rdj should get best supporting but accept the award as Heath ledger via method acting. Kate winslet should win the “so awesome it’s embarassing for her to have to even compete” award, while meryl Streep wins the “I could literally take a two hour dump on camera and be nominated” award (an aside: she really was great in “doubt”), then we all age backward and turn into fetuses who stage a bollywood production number before we revert to our pre-fertilized state. Ps: where the hell are speilberg and tom hanks in all this?