accidental feminist

beauty and the geek revelation #37 January 25, 2007

Oh, Nate and Jennylee. Even in a population of 16, of which there are 8 men (all of average or below average sex appeal) and 8 women (all of above average to high sex appeal), the coolest guy and the best looking girl are inexplicably attracted to each other. I guess the reason girls tell guys they wouldn’t sleep with them if they were the last person on earth is precisely because there is no one to whom they can compare them in order to come to the conclusion that it could be worse.

Natural selection perseveres.

persecuting another quality individual January 23, 2007

Why must Joe Francis be singled out and persecuted?! If they want to make an example of an exploitative misogynist, I have a couple of ex-boyfriends who are looking to pick up trash by the freeway.

It’s funny because it hurts; or because it’s true. I forget which.

(link courtesy of yosefblog)

unmotivated to post January 18, 2007

It’s not like I have a lacking of fodder: My recent viewing of “Jesus Camp”, my newly opened improv show, Dina’s week long illness. Maybe it’s just the finals week blues, but I just don’t feel like saying anything (except that I wore my Citizens to school for the first time today and got “mad compliments” from all the teenage girls. One students shook her head, smiled affectionately, and said “You would, Klein…” Not sure about that one…)

That’s it! Someone start a thread of comments on something interesting (and by “someone” I mean “Matt” and by “something interesting” I mean “George Simmel”.)

oh beauty and the geek, why do i love thee? January 12, 2007

I know, I know. It’s no more mindless than “The Real Wives of the O.C.” or “Armed and Famous”, but there’s something so fascinating about the social dynamics that I can’t stop watching. It’s like merging The University of Chicago’s Society for Creative Anacronism with the Ohio State cheerleading squad. I am also fascinated (but not surprised) by the fact that elimination is decided completely based on the female 1/2 of the team; as in, the team who chooses who to eliminate is strictly concerned with which girl they want to kick out. This makes sense because the boys are too socially retarded to know how to be backhanded or cut-throat, and therefore wield no power or influence. I think Yosef has a few books they could read…

And for the record, Nate’s a plant; he would be a total stud in Hyde Park. I mean, the man wears big stupid un-broken-in trucker hats and unmatching plaids on purpose; he’s a superhipster.

brand deprogramming January 8, 2007

Bassie: Mommy, is that a commercial?

Me: (looking at the television) Yes, it is.

Bassie: Oh, ok. (pause) I want to buy that.

Me: What?

Bassie: Get it? Because it’s a *commercial*.

The child has seen the Matrix.

darth vader scares me January 6, 2007

Why, oh why, do I get physically nauseated seeing young Anakin succumb to the Dark Side? I think it’s the same as the fear I have of drug addiction: losing one’s senses and falling under the power of an external and negative influence one is quite nearly powerless to resist. While this may trace back to finding out, at the age of eight, that the teenage boy down the block was a pot dealer, and my imagining what sordid, evil things transpired at the end of Clavinia Ave., I think it has more to do with my slightly obsessive need for self-control and the rule of logic. An independent and clear consciousness (not conscience, God knows none of us have those) has always been, one of my greatest assets, and I guard it very closely.

This is also why I freak out when my kids show signs of refined sugar- dependence. Like yesterday, when Bassie claimed that she “needed some gum because she couldn’t taste the sugar from her last treat anymore”. It gave me the chills. Resist the call of the Dark Side, young Klein!

day in the field January 3, 2007

As we left the Field Museum today, I asked the girls to name one thing they learned:

Bassie: That if two different animals have a baby together , then their baby can’t have babies. Like a butterfly and a mouse would have a buttermouse, but it couldn’t have a baby. (I set her straight on the “buttermouse” thing).

Dina: If something has short legs then it can’t run away from the animal that wants to eat it, so it gets eaten before it can get married and have babies, so the guys with the long legs only have babies, so all of the guys start to have long legs (hmmm…yeah, that’s a pretty good handle on natural selection for a 3 year old).

My work is done here.

happy 2007 January 1, 2007

This year has seen many important events in the Klein household. A brief recap:
* Bassie learned to add negative numbers.
* Dina realized that it’s her life’s vocation to be a prima ballerina.
* Yosef started on the path to soul-sucking riches.
* Rachel began and completed her course of study at Chicago’s historical (if 25 years counts as history) iO theatre (formerly known as “improv Olympic”; damn the I.O.C.). If you want to see her show how little she’s learned, come on down to Wrigleyville Sunday nights in January and February at 9 PM.

Well, those are some highlights, and a shameless plug. Hope your new year brings all of your dreams closer…