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Monthly Archives: August 2006

wife swap = I heart dysfunction

Okay, so I may have watched two whole episodes of this addicting swill, but I am not impressed. Some of my beefs: * Peppy music for thin, happy couples, and sluggish, elephant music for the fat ones * Treating people who are clearly mentally unhealthy as though they’re just quirky and frustrating. I.e. A woman [...]

Model Citizens?

Okay, I’m putting it to a vote: Should I allow my children to exploit themselves as child models? Bassie’s actually not as interested as Dina, who is convinced that being a model means wearing butterfly wings. What do my fellow AFers think: is the college savings fund worth the possible exposure to childhood anorexia and [...]

four (beautiful) eyes

As you know, Bassie has glasses. As you don’t know, it’s worse than we thought. Her prescription is not -6.0, as previously thought. It’s actually -11.5. In case you don’t know, that’s really farsighted. Coke-bottle glasses farsighted. So farsighted, actually, that she has to wear contacts so that her vision is not completely distorted. Custom-made [...]

revelation about my high school self

Maybe it’s the Depeche Mode (or INXS? Who knows?) that I’m listening to as I prepare for my poorly attended 29th birthday party, but something’s getting me nostalgic for those more complicated high school days. You know, when everything you said was dissected by your friends and reassembled behind your back to your great chagrin [...]

guess who(‘s coming to dinner)?

Bassie, Dina and I are playing “Guess Who”, a simple guessing game where people are categorized by simple visual traits: glasses or not, hair color, gender, etc (incidentally, what a wonderful lesson in how to reduce someone into a few distinctive physical traits and then “choose” them based on their having or lacking a particular [...]

the best things about getting a 37″ plasma tv with comcast digital cable (TM)

*pausing the Colbert Report to get a snack *watching “Entourage” on demand *watching “Kingpin” from 1 AM to 3 AM on a Tuesday night *watching all the “Girls Gone Wild” commercials I want- and just for the record, my favorite part of the commercial is when they ask the girl: “What would it take to [...]