Was that an insult? March 7, 2006
Have you ever been the recipient of a comment that made you wonder if it was a compliment or an insult? Today a student told me I did not look like myself. Instead, I looked “teachery”. Was that an insult? Does that mean I normally look good, but today I looked “teachery”? Or, does it mean I normally look bad and today I looked “teachery”?
And what is so “teachery” about Cole Haan sling backs, a pair of black JCrew favorite fit wool slacks, an untucked white JCrew button down, and a coral JCrew cotton sweater vest?
Thank you very much.
I’ll field this one.
First of all, kudos to you for reading into the adolescent’s comment.
BeautyQueen, your student gave you what we call a “neg” - short for “negative” comment. Negs are used to express both interest and disinterest simultaneously.
Interest is expressed by the simple fact that he (or she) is taking time to remark on something that is solely about you. The way you dress, your earrings, the size of your wrists, etc…
BUT he/she also made a semi-insulting comment, to convey a LACK of sexual interest. And now you’re questioning motives, actuality of the comment. So perhaps tomorrow you’ll wear something that you self-define as “Un-teachery” to try and elicit a more desireable response.
Something form-fitting, or revealing, maybe even an outfit normally reserved for going out.
At least he didn’t say that you blink a lot.
- EATS